Becoming a millionaire is much easier than one would think. You don’t have to invest in stocks, find a cure for cancer, or even have any skills in the working world. There’s a whole industry out there dedicated to the farming, feeding, and showcasing of pseudo-talent for all the world to see. And you can be part of it too. All you have to do is write some lyrics.

Now, don’t get intimidated. A lot of people struggle to write meaningful lines that will strike the hearts of audiences abroad, but you really don’t have to put that much effort into it. Think about all the songs you hear on the radio. You don’t hear Justin Bieber singing about economic inequality or hunger in Africa. No, he’s still singing about that girl he met back in 2010. Long story short, people love simple words that they can understand and messages that aren’t too complex. Addressing serious issues with music is a waste of time because no one listens to the words anyway. Write about something people can relate to such as sex or drugs. It’s the only way to ensure that people will remember and understand your lyrics.

The next issue is the backing track, or the music you sing on top of. A lot of musicians try to pick unique chords that are rhetorically tied to the greater message of the piece, but who has time for that? There’s a short-cut in the playbook that’s been used over and over again since the 1960’s. It’s the I-V-vi-IV chord progression, and everyone from The Beatles to Katy Perry has used it at one point or another. If that doesn’t do it for you, then you can certainly just sample someone else’s song, or even just take out the words and add your own. 

Don’t worry if you’re not a good singer; the Digital Era has solved that problem for you! Professional sound engineers can auto-tune your voice and cut out any sloppy notes. Repeat the process eight to ten times and you’ve got yourself a record. Congratulations–––I’m sure you’ll be star.